Waka Laka!
by Anna Tramell
Summary: Through the game DDR, Harry and Voldemort find themselves in the world of waka laka and are stuck with one another and no wands. Oh my... how will they escape each other?
1. Part 1

**Title**: Waka laka!

**Summary**: Through the game DDR, Harry and Voldemort find themselves in the world of waka laka and are stuck with one another and no wands. Oh my... how will they escape each other?

**Rating/Warning**: I. Don't. Know. Let's say Teen.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the Harry Potter cast (J.K. Rowling's) or Dance Dance Revolution -DDR- which is Konami's I think... I make no money, so nnyyaahhhhh.

**A/N**: Turn the infernal song off. TURN. it. OFF! Or the next set of fanfictions are all going to have Harry singing WAKA LAKA... By the way, this format is inspired by a poem-like thing written from my favourite teacher... but that's just the intro...

Also... the pocky issue really did happen to someone. But it was in a different store... Neither of them don't seem to have pocky... only select ones... grrr...

-x- INTRO -x-

So proclaimed Harry Potter, "I need to lose weight!"

So proclaimed Lord Voldemort, "I need a game!"

So proclaimed Lucius Malfoy, "I'm hungry!"

-

So asked Harry Potter, "How _do _I lose weight?"

So asked Lord Voldemort, "What game should I play?"

So asked Lucius, "Is there any pocky left?"

-

So answered Hermione, "I have no idea."

So answered Goyle, "Scrabble."

So answered the mirror, "No."

-

So said Harry Potter, "That doesn't help..."

So said Lord Voldemort, "I hate scrabble."

So cursed Lucius, "BEEP!"

-

So prounouced the whole crew: "LET'S GO TO WAL-MART!"

-n.n-

"I wonder how Wal-Mart ended up in Diagon Alley..." Hermione wandered outloud as they went down the first aisle. Ron zoomed by in a cart with a unsurpressed "WHEE!"

"Wal-Mart is everywhere..." Harry pointed out, vaguely as he picked up a box of chocolate wafers longingly. "Oh sugar, oh love, oh the one I wish to eat," he said, dramatically, "Oh, how I long to shove your chocolatey goodness down my throat, one after another, forgetting momentarily that I am two pounds overweight. Oh, how I-"

"Hey, look over there!"

Harry dropped the box of evil to see the electronics area of the super-store. Disco lights, for some odd reason, had dominated the area and were advertising around a sign.

"Join... the... Dance Dance Revolution..." read Harry. Ron zoomed toward them and then came to a stop.

"Whoa, Harry! LOOK! LIGHTS!"

"I think I heard about this game..." Hermione muttered, digging through the files of her mind. "Ah! It's a new game for the system 'Play-station Two' (based off the popular arcade game)that's been created to get kids off their butts and get active because they're getting addicted to the ones where they just sit there and press buttons. Created in Japan and owned by the company Konami, featuring over hundreds of songs and-"

"Sooo," cut in Harry, "it'll help me get fit so I can wear those leather pants... right?"

"Well... yes..."

"IT HAS LIGHTS, IT HAS LIGHTS, IT HAS LIGHTS!! LET'S GET IT!" shouted Ron. He pounded Harry in the back repeatedly until the teen had whipped out a few thousands for the arcade version, paid, picked up his purchase, and left the store.

"Hmm... let's see if this works..."

-c.c-

Lord Voldemort is the laziest snake-man to roam the earth. Instead of wandering around like most people, he went straight to customer service, followed by a long line of Death Eaters.

"It's kinda shocking to find such a muggle store right down the road..." Bellatrix thought outloud looking around.

"Hey, Bella, look at the clothes!"

They fell in giggles at the lack of dark colours until Narcissa found a shirt stating "I can only please one person a day. I choose me!"

"Oh, Bella, this is _so_ you!"

"Heh... I think I might steal that one..."

"Me too..."

"Think the Dark Lord will be mad?" They were _muggle_ clothes...

They shrugged and hurried back to the group before they were noticed.

"I want a game that will enhance my mind, is top-notch, and hours of entertainment," stated Lord Voldemort.

"Scrabble?" the man offered from behind the counter.

"NO!" He rose his scary stick, lowered it with a sigh, then said in a slower tone, "No... I do not like scrabble..."

"WHERE'S THE POCKY?!" screamed a worried Lucius. "I CAN'T FIND THE POCKY!!"

"...hockey?" repeated the customer service man."

"No! POCKY! You know... POCKY!" The normally up-right composed man was beyond himself in fear that his precious snack wasn't available. "It's those really yummy stuff that-"

"Sir, we do not sell hockey equipment."

"JUST TELL ME WHERE YOU HIDE THE POCKY!"

"Lucius, shut up..." Moving the conversation back to the previous interuppted conversation. "Now, the game. I just need something to let me relax and have fun after a hard day's work, but it can't make me stupid. I've got a world to run."

"Riight... did you see the display in electronics?"

"No, I did not," he said through gritted teeth.

"Well, um, you should go there..."

Lord Voldemort turned around with a sigh and set off down the aisles. A rush of wind sent his cloak billowing but he ignored it, his eyes moving around for this supposed electronics area.

"Oh, look!"

Annoying bright lights went into his red eyes. He growled, reading the sign "Join the Dance Dance Revolution..."

"The people on the screen look like they're having fun," pointed out Avery.

"They do... He strode toward a nearby worker, picking two pockets along the way. "I want the most expensive version of that game." He nodded toward the display.

"You want the arcade version?"

"Sure..."

"I'M SO GETTING A PAY RAISE FOR MAKING THE DISPLAY!" he screamed in happiness. "BOOSTED SALES UP!" He coughed, smiled nervously, and then went to ring them up. "Shall we carry this to your vehicle?"

"No thank you," he said politely, touching the large box and then apparated them away.

-u.u-

"Whoa this looks fun!!" said Ron excitedly when the sytem had been plugged in through the Dursley's living room. You see, the family was on vacation and would never notice if a group of teens camped out and borrowed their electricity and food.

"Harry, you have to do the tutorial!" Hermione cried out, but too late, Harry had chosen a song and had even put it on light dancing, just because the boy hero is cool like that. (Light dancing is the second stage up...)

"Watch me lose three pounds!" he whispered, excitedly.

"WAKA LAKA!" Ron yelled, just as excited as the music started up, jumping up and down behind Harry as his support. "DO WAKA LAKA!"

WAKA LAKA IS THE THING TO PLAY FOREVER!

JUST TO BE TOGETHER (JUST TO BE TOGETHER!)

WAKA LAKA IS THE PLACE TO BE FOREVER!

WAKA LAKA LOVE AND FANTASY!

The song cut off - the screen flashed "FAILED"

"MY TURN, MY TURN, MY TURN!" Ron yelled, and being slightly smarter, switched it to beginner. And so it went.

-q.q-

Voldemort shut himself in his quarters with his brand-new game, a boyish sort of creepy grin covered his face as he stood on the game pad. "I SHALL BE THE MASTER OF THIS DEVICE!" he yelled wth enthusiam, and pounced one of the buttons. Select... single... select... beginner... select song...

He paused then did random.

The music started up...

His eyes widened slightly at the sudden start-up of sound. Oh god... it... it SOUNDED CUTE!

And yet his legs started dancing and following arrows... already, he was captured.

Little did he know, that he would be playing this same song for the next month and obsessively. Singing the song when he was otherwise away from the game. (ohh waka laka... how we all love thee)

-x-

"I WILL DEFEAT YOU!" yelled the pumped Harry as he moved the playing level to the highest form. It was sometime after midnight, his two best friends were somehow sleeping through the song that kept repeating, but he would finally do it. He would conquer waka laka on the hardest level and he would before he dared to sleep. He, in fact, had refused to sleep much for the past month... had forgotten his birthday... he was extremely pumped and WOULD win!

_waka laka is a neverending story_

_floaty floaty floaty (floaty floaty floaty)_

_waka laka is the place to be forever_

_waka laka love and-_

_waka laka love and-_

_waka laka love and FANTASY!_

"YES!!!" screamed Harry and coincidentally, Voldemort as well several miles away. "YES! I DID IT! I WIIIN!" But then... there was a very very bright light, Harry felt a sensation close to that of a portkey or traveling through floo powder...

-x.x- To Be Continued -x.x-

I hear the song... so... much... so there... should this be continued? This song drives me up a wall... won't let me write sexy fanfiction yaoi... maybe I'm free for now... maybe n.n


	2. Part 2 end

**Title: **_Waka Laka_

**Warning**: Light swearing at the most…

**Disclaimer**: I don't own DDR… _yet_, but I did listen to "Waka Laka" the entire time that I typed this. I feel that I should put claim to this.

**Recap**: _We last left our two characters suddenly in a very… very strange world… _

**Day 1**

"_Waka Laka is the thing to play forever, just to be together__**, just to be together**__, Waka Laka is the place to be forever-"_

Voldemort (AKA Tom Marvolo Riddle, The Dark Lord, and He-Who-Cannot-Kill-A-Baby) felt his eyes widen to the point of almost dropping from their sockets. Bright colours flashed with increasing speed, belting out the shrill song as flowers and various objects dared to dance so merrily. Voldemort reached for his wand.

"OMG!"

At the same time, Harry James Potter (AKA The Chosen One, The Lion, He-Who-Refuses-To-Die) sat up in bright grass, experiencing the same horrific scene, reaching for his own stick in his pants.

Neither sticks were present.

Screaming would have been an ideal way to handle the situation, but Harry instead noticed the other man just beside him and went utterly silent.

"DDR Accident?" Voldemort questioned the boy.

Throat dry, he nodded and continued to fumble in his pants with hope.

"Damned game…"

Another nod, more fumbling.

"All right, dammit! Talk to me so we can figure out how to get the hell out of here!"

"You want to just calmly talk this out?" Harry whispered in complete shock (with a hint of accusation).

Voldemort glared at him.

"As two enemies… _helping_ each other?"

"I'll figure out how to kill you later."

Harry considered this and then nodded once more. "Fair enough."

They surveyed the area again, and noticed that the sky didn't hold clouds, but rather a large array of arrows.

"Maybe we have to dance to the song?" Harry thought out loud. "Have you memorized it?"

Voldemort snorted. "I assume we're going to play _basic_?"

"_Heavy_, you bastard!"

As the song started from the beginning once again, they leaped into action, perfecting the song twice, and the third time, adding in their own hand motions before realizing it had no effect.

"Ookay, then…"

"You said it would work!" Voldemort growled, shoving the boy heavily onto the ground.

Harry landed on a flower, that still sang (but in muffled undertone) and – wiggling from under the large mass fallen on it – continued with its dance.

"Is this _Hell_?! Am I in _Hell_?!" Voldemort asked, mortified. "Godda –" He stopped abruptly and finished with "FRICK!"

"You're a friggin' psychopath…" Harry rubbed his head, sighing. "How about we go exploring?"

**Day 2**

Both Harry Potter and Voldemort lay against a psychedelic tree, wide-eyed and completely washed out.

"I… _really_… hate this song…"

"I… I actually… agree… with you…"

"G'day!" a highlighted orange coloured creature greeted as he jumped into view. He reminded Harry vaguely of the cartoons that Dudley watched before school – where nudity was obviously present but never shown on the unclothed freaky looking _things_. "My name is Fsyloada Shzy Piazx Anthony!"

Harry and Voldemort – with open-mouthed, glum expressionless stares – gave simultaneous creaky nods.

"You can call me Fsy," he continued, twirling a large baton. Harry half-wondered if there was candy concealed inside of it.

"What the fuc-_ggle_ are you?" Voldemort asked, keeping swears from his speed (just in case).

"'Xcuse me?"

"What… _are _you?"

"I'm an Aka!"

"How… original…"

The creature beamed and curtsied an imaginary skirt. "Thank you!"

"Why… are we here?" Harry rasped. "Why… _with him_?"

"It's simple!"

Voldemort craned his neck. "It… is?"

"You two – together – have to figure it out on your own."

"So… why are _you_ here?" Harry muttered.

"To ensure there is no death!"

"Can't even _kill_ myself," Voldemort sighed in defeat.

"So," danced Fsy, "Let's get going!"

"Where?" Voldemort questioned.

"I don't know! But let's go!"

Harry sighed and stood, shielding himself form the neon bright arrangement of colour. "Gotta figure this out, right?" he answered to Voldemort's inquiring stare.

The man stood, and shrugged his shoulders as a sort of agreement.

"…meh."

**Day 3**

"Well… we've found absolutely nothing," Voldemort summed up, growling deeply.

"Except for some fruit!" The Optimistic Fsy reminded cheerfully.

"Which is better than nothing," Harry tried. Fsy smiled.

"You're screwing with us, aren't you?" Voldemort muttered at the aka. "Look, I want to go home and continue my plans for world domination! And killing _that_ guy!" (He, of course, pointed to the boy carrying an armload of dark red round fruits.

Fsy bowed his orange head. "Apologies, sir."

"Yeah, like _that_ helps… bast-hole."

Harry rolled his eyes and took a bite of the fruit before him. It had an interesting cocktail sort of taste to it – a "Bloody Mary" sort of concoction, if you will. A slow smile spread over his ruby lips.

He really liked the fruit.

He put one through Voldemort's bitchy lips and watched a fuzzy, warm smile cross his expression.

"We should get more fruit…"

**Day 4**

"_Waka Laka is the thing to play forever, just to be together, just to be together. Waka Laka is so magical and tender –"_The trio sang all together, swinging their arms and nearly tripping on their own feet as they gave a drunken attempt to Irish step dancing.

"_Waka Laka love and fantasy!"_ screamed Harry.

"I… I like it here…" Voldemort reported faintly.

"Chorus!" cried out Fsy.

"_Waka Laka is a never ending story! Floaty, floaty, float –"_

_-_

"_WAKA LAKA LOVE AND FANTASY!!"_ Harry finished, leaping up. His eyes snapped open to find Hermione and Ron's peering into his own, rather worriedly.

"Sup?"

**Epilogue**

It was never proven whether the events with the Waka Laka world had ever been true, but unexplainably, Voldemort's target turned from one-year-olds to Ireland (and therefore, no problem to the British Ministry of Magic) and Harry was known to burst into song, rumoured to have sang the very same tune while drinking in a pub with the dark lord. It's known only that the game of DDR should never be taken lightly – just ask Fsy… he _knows_.

**-x- X -x- OWARI -x- X -x-**

_But did they have mad passionate sex? No, in fact, they didn't. They merely drank and sang and danced while drunk … This said, Review?_


End file.
